Good Morning. I have decided to enact a complete and total ban on snow, effective immediately, for the next seven months. No need to thank me now. Just enjoy the nice weather. But don’t forget your Morning Coffee.
On occasion, I relate to you little phrases that I find annoying. “Ate his/her lunch” is one such statement. This phrase is used in the follow situation. While discussing Candidate B’s response to a tactic used by Candidate A, a political pundit will say, “He ate her lunch”, meaning that B out-maneuvered A. I always get the image in my head that he sort of pushed her out of her seat and proceeded to devour her lunch while looking at her menacingly out of the corner of his eye. Is this the sort of image we want of our politicians? As ravenous madmen and women running around and eating everyone’s lunch?
Now pardon me while I eat some lunch…figuratively of course.
I’d Like an Ice Cold Glass of Estrogen Water, with a Lemon Wedge:
Ahh…don’t you love those inflammatory headlines? I’m practicing for a gig in tabloid journalism when I retire, so bear with me. Inflammatory or not, the news is that an Associated Press (AP) study has found pharmaceuticals in the drinking water of at least 41 million Americans. You name it, it’s in there: acetaminophen, antibiotics, anti-convulsants, mood stabilizers, sex hormones, anti-epileptics, asthma drugs, drugs for high cholesterol and heart problems. Sounds terrible. I’m no doctor or pharmacist, but when I read something like that, it sort of makes me stop and think for a minute.
Someone might reasonably as, “How did these drugs get into our water supplies?” Some might reasonably recall the days when companies regularly placed into rivers all sorts of chemical waste. This is nothing so nefarious. You put them there. So did your grandfather with a heart condition. You there on the Pill, you too. The fact is, we’ve all put them with a dangerous weapon called urine. You might not have ever thought about it; when you take prescription drugs, your body only absorbs some of it. The rest is passed in your waste. Into the toilet it goes, and then into sewage systems. Then treated it goes into the water table to make its way to rivers and lakes and then evaporates into the air. Then it is rained out into and onto other water systems. In this way, virtually no water is free of this sort of pollution. (Side note: I remember reading about the relatively massive amounts of cocaine in river water in northern Italy a few years ago. Same concept.)
I know what you’re thinking; that the water is treated and that will rid the water of these unwanted drugs. Not the case. Virtually no one tests for prescription drugs and the treatments/filters used do nothing to these drugs. It’s pretty much an invisible issue. Don’t worry though; think of it as a prophylactic like fluoride, but for the heart and mind…or whatever.
The next question is what sort of impact will this have on people and wildlife? No one really knows. It would be reasonable to assume that the impact would be minimal considering that the amounts of any one drug present in the water are so miniscule that it would not adversely affect a person. But remember, these drugs were specifically designed to interact with the human body in small amounts, as the companies that make them realize that a majority of the drug is not absorbed. So this might pose a problem. Problems could arise years later, after cumulative exposure. Or it could be that the tests are so powerful that they can detect drugs even though they would have no affect no humans. Even if this is the case, that these drugs would have no adverse affects whatsoever, it still doesn’t really sit well, does it? I frankly don’t enjoy the fact that I’m consuming trace amounts of your daughter’s epileptic medication. But then again, I’m consuming trace amounts of arsenic and all sorts of other naturally occurring things that are bad for me.
Never fear, though. Officials representing state and local agencies have insisted that their water meets all federal and state regulations regarding quality and safety. They’re not lying either, because there are no federal or state regulations that set guidelines for pharmaceutical pollution.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s really no one to blame (other than America’s love affair with prescription drugs). But we should study this little understood phenomenon so we can understand what impact it’s having on humans and the rest of the pyramid of life.
Oh Sweet Irony, How Do I Love Thee:
Let me count the ways…I told you of the now famous “Who do you want answering the White House phone at 3 AM” commercial a few days ago. Who would have guessed that the highly influential commercial used footage that was originally intended for a railroad advertisement and was shot 10 years ago? It did. Clinton’s campaign bought the footage from Getty Images.
It turns out that the star of that commercial is Casey Knowles, a 17 year old (soon to be 18) high school student in Washington State. Her brother saw the commercial on “The Daily Show” and her family blah blah blah…digital recorder…blah blah…erupted… Anyway, in a twist of fate, turns out that Casey positively loves Barack Obama. Maximizing her 15 minutes, she was interviewed on “Good Morning America Weekend Edition” (not good enough for prime time or even the weekday edition, I see – media bias against Obama perhaps?). In this interview, she says about the ad: “What I don’t like about the ad is its fear-mongering. I think it’s a cheap hit to take. I really prefer Obama’s message of looking forward to a bright future.” You know, I agree…it’s cheap to suggest, right or wrong, that your opponent may not have the necessary qualifications to, you know, protect the nation and stuff. Like, that’s totally cheap and fear-mongering and stuff. And I too, like, totally dig Obama’s message of hope and bright futures. So bright that I gotta, like, wear shades.
I needn’t tell you, dear readers, that I’m utilizing my favorite device: sarcasm. Surely, I admire Casey’s optimism, and respect her right to choose to support any candidate she wishes to, but in fairness, Casey is herself a neophyte when it comes to…virtually everything. I will concede that it’s an interesting twist of fate that the girl who stars in the commercial that likely won Clinton some states last week is an Obama supporter, but come on. What’s worse is that her mother Pam told The News Tribune of Tacoma that Casey attended an Obama rally in Seattle and that she “cried and trembled after shaking the candidate’s hand.” Seriously? She cried and trembled? It is at this time that I refer to Casey’s prior statement regarding “forward to a bright future” and point out that her support of Obama is not based on reason or logic but instead the whimsical giddiness of the Flock. No person, and especially no politician, should upon being met, elicit from you trembling and tears. Notable exceptions include Jesus (joy), the anti-Christ (fear), Genghis Khan (fear), Attila the Hun (fear), Stalin (fear), or the Ghost of Tom Joad (joy), or any sentient undead (fear) (sorry zombie lovers).
As I’m pressed for time…I’ve got more on the nausea inducing tanker contract, but I’ll have to get to it another day.
Word of the Day: Inchoate (adjective): 1. In an initial or early stage; just begun. 2. Imperfectly formed or formulated.
On This Day in History: Today is Johnny Appleseed Day. Celebrate accordingly.
“Look back over the past, with its changing empires that rose and fell, and you can foresee the future, too.” – Marcus Aurelius.
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