Morning Coffee (136)

Through the brain-splitting din of a weed-whacker and a lawnmower, I toil to Brew you the Morning Coffee. Nothing but the best for my legion of readers.

In the early days of the Morning Coffee, prestigious entities asked that I present editions on their behalf. Well, in the spirit of solidarity, singularity, and homogeneity, today's Morning Coffee is brought to you by...the Democratic Party. Because pretty soon, they're going to be bringing to you all sorts of good things.

Get Out Snuff Out the Vote:

We hear all sorts of calls from every venue to vote. I pose a different call to arms. I say we "snuff out" the vote. Sure, this is controversial. No one will like it. It would be hard to do. While the majority can ignore these calls to vote, the ones who show up at the polls are thoroughly indoctrinated and would find it exceedingly difficult to not vote. I've always believed that voting was a civic duty, so even posing such a thing sounds weird to me. I am contemplating not voting for either of the two "major" candidates. I might not vote at all *gasp*. I'm disappointed in my choices for President. I'm disappointed in my choices for virtually every elected office from assemblyman to US Senate. To vote is to use your voice; to speak to power, and even change the government. But I'm too cynical to believe that any change, such as that posed by Barack Obama, will be any change at all. No, I expect more of the same, but with a more liberal leaning this time around. I expect an even more partisan, inept Congress. Maybe our silence would speak louder than any rebel yell in the poll booths.

My goal for this Snuff Out the Vote campaign would be to achieve a less than 10% voter turnout. We would be the laughing stock of the world. Our oft-touted democratic principles ridiculed. How could we, the United States, preach global democracy when our own people won't even vote? This ridicule, of course, assumes that in a democracy, the consumer (the voter) must buy what the salesmen (politicians) are selling. It's assuming that one MUST vote. If all the cars made by all the car companies of the world were terrible in craftsmanship and safety, how many cars would be sold? Refusal to vote is simply adding free market principles to democracy. You don't buy when you're not pleased with the product. And this time, I'm not buying, even though I've been a loyal customer for years and it pains me to do so.

What purpose would this serve? Who knows? I would like to see it as an awakened national consciousness; a citizenry refreshed and ready to not only begin anew, but to take part in the system. Not simply voting, but actually taking part. Discussing issues within their towns and cities. Doing things. Civic virtue, writ large.

Some will think this foolish. Some will say to me, "Brewer, why not vote for and support third party candidates?" To that I say, I do not support any candidate, for one, and more importantly, the current system is broken. Something drastic is necessary to shake it up. We're in a deep, nasty rut, one advised against by George Washington. Third party candidates are not viable in our present system. They receive virtually no exposure in the current model. Do you remember seeing a single third party candidate at a Presidential debate this year? I don't. Prior to the last edition of the Morning Coffee, how many of you had even heard of any of the third party candidates? Here's something to chew on: the House of Representatives has exactly zero members from a party not called "Republican" or "Democrat." The Senate has one, Joseph Lieberman, who was until 2006 a Democrat. Membership totals are 535 and 100, respectively. It looks like this as a fraction: 1/635. Decimals do more for you? Well, that's 0.00157. Rounded up, it's two-tenths of a percent. Our system is dominated in nearly every way by two political ideologies. Someone more eloquent than I could probably argue that this is tyranny by default and by exclusion.

The Obama campaign wants you to talk to you boss or professor. They want you to ask for the day off so you can vote. I don't see how you need the whole day off to vote, but let's go with it. Really stick it to them by asking for and getting the day off, but stay home and read a book. Or just goof off. They won't know. They can't ask you. To do so and condemn you is to violate your freedom to exercise your political voice. So you chose to be silent. Tell them that you're an independent, but as there were no viable independent candidates from which to choose, you were forced into not voting. You didn't like the product. Why shouldn't you get the day off when the droves of Obama and McCain fans do? You have the right to be heard, too. Of course, we could just get rid of a stupid holiday like Columbus Day and make Election Day a national holiday, making the whole issue moot. But what am I thinking? We need a holiday to celebrate a guy who wasn't even the first European to find something that was always there (a topic for another time, perhaps).

Certainly, my scheme is no more viable than the election of a Libertarian to President, which is sort of the real point to all my bloviating. The hooks the two-party system has in our population are too deep. Too often, our citizenry are led into the booths like cattle; their votes cast solely on whether the candidate has a (D) or an (R) after his or her name. They can't even vote with their own best interests in mind because they don't know what their best interests are and how any candidate will further those interests. I ask myself, is this what we've become? Perhaps it's always what we've been. But I would like to be proven wrong.

One Party Rule...uh, Rules! *pumps fist* HEUAWW!:

Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean is excited at the prospects of the Democratic party controlling all aspects of the government. He says, "Republicans had a chance to rule. They failed miserably. I think it's time to give the other party a chance."

Notice, Quaffers, the verbiage. "Rule." "The other party." We all know that we're merely a mob to be ruled by the genteel touch of our elected officials. No way can any of us rule ourselves. We need the divine hand of governance to tell us poor, lost souls what to do, and how to do it, and when to do it. Where would we be, Dear Dean, without thee?! And "the other party" as if we have only two. Was he talking about the Libertarian Party? The Green Party? The Communist Party? Wait...yeah...I guess it's time to give the other party a chance. That party's track record is infinitely better than that of the other party.

Dean also says, "You cannot trust Republicans with your money. They will borrow and spend, borrow and spend, borrow and spend." Surely, the other party, as you say, has never done that.

Am I defending the Republican party? Of course not. I'm simply pointing out how absurd Dean's statements are. HEAUWW!!!

In another article, we sheep are told that we shouldn't fear Democratic control. Is that something good "rulers" tell their flock?

Guided by GPS:

I recently purchased a Garmin Nuvi 250w, which is a GPS device, and I must say, well done. I'm not going to review the item, but I do recommend GPS to anyone who travels to destinations unknown. It makes driving in areas unfamiliar to me very easy. But, I do still have an atlas in the back of my seat. Old habits die hard, and I like knowing that I can still navigate if my GPS goes kaput, be it by dead battery or the Chinese shooting down the satellites.

Word of the Day: Execrable (adj): 1. Deserving to be execrated; detestable; abominable. 2. Extremely bad; of very poor quality; very inferior.

On This Day in History: Maxentius is proclaimed Roman Emperor (306 CE). Six years later, Maxentius is defeated by Constantine I at the battle of Milvian Bridge (312). The Volstead Act is passed by Congress over President Wilson's veto, paving the way for Prohibition (1919).

"It is true that liberty is precious; so precious that it must be carefully rationed." - Vladimir Ilyich Lenin. Yes...ration my liberty, oh wise governors.